My kitchen sink is haunted.

I swear it is.

Every three hours or so, it'll dribble a weak jet of water--almost like someone's turned it on very  low--and then it'll stop.  

I'm naming the ghost Mr. Dilke.  And no, that name has no particular meaning.  It simply sounds amusing (and slightly dirty).  

~balaustinus

So,  I think I passed my first test in Japanese class.  I feel the need to squeal, but I'm too tired right now.  

I also, despite my better judgement, want to write fanfiction.  I don't write fanfiction.  But I want to.  I want to write a PGSM fanfic.  Which mortifies me, because few people know I still dabble in Sailor Moon.  But, y'know, I totally wouldn't if Rei and Minako weren't so annoyingly gay.  They radiate gay.  They exude gay from every pore on their body.  Especially their PGSM incarnates. 

I'm going to go watch Rei and Minako radiate gay now.

And contemplate writing that one-shot.

I hate you, Naoko.

~balaustinus

I decided on a whim to take Japanese this summer.  It was the first day, and I'm already drowning!  All I can remember are lines (strokes of the brush) and a, i, u, e, o, ka, ki, ku, ke, ko.  But I can't figure out how I'm going to memorize the symbols.

I feel like a kindergartener again.  Only dumber.

Man, forget having fun this summer.  All I'll be doing is serving coffee and repeating my Japanese syllables.

I am so awful at updating my journal.  I can't help it!  For one, LJ likes to randomly freeze one me, and I have to end up rebooting my computer.  And two, I'm usually on Facebook.  Facebook's easier to update on.  

So, what's going on with me.  I'm now a Certified Barista (TM) at Starbucks!  It's actually less glamorous than it sounds, but I still feel a silly sense of accomplishment whenever I say it.  Besides work, I'm working on applying for a Creative Writing scholarship at the New York State Summer Writer's Institute.  And it's due in March.  I will now randomly emit dsgruntled sounds and stay hunched over my computer for the remainder of the night.

~balaustinus

Since it's been for-eva since I've posted, I decided to fill you lovelies in on what's been happening.

I started working at Tony Roma's after Midtown was closed, but I've quit there to work exclusively at Starbucks.  It's much more fun than Tony Roma's, sans the great ribs.

Mum and I are selling our house to move to the most darling little bungalow in Hendersonville.  Get this--the neighborhood's called Horny Heights.  No joke.  Even funnier, most of the people who live in Hendersonville are retirees.  Dirty-minded old people are the best.

I'm still single, but I'm fine with that.  I haven't found anyone I really want to get to know better, and I have absolutely no time for a girlfriend.  I have myself, and that's good enough for me.

I must go study Emily Dickinson for tomorrow's Lit class.  Until next time,

~balaustinus

I am officially twenty.  Gasp!

It's quite odd, knowing that I'll never be a child again.  And I don't necessarily miss my childhood, per se, but the innocence and wild abandon that children have...that I had.  That I'll miss.

Now onto another rant~!  Seems my workplace was closed down by the sheriff for "shady dealings" (as one girl put it so well), so not only am I now without a job, I won't get paid for the time I worked there.    

Being an adult sucks.

~balaustinus

Joy!

It seems Mom isn't kicking me out!  Which means I don't have to be a streetwalker in the ghettos of Charlotte! 

I am unbelievably happy right now.  ...oh, wait, I sti have exams.

Shit.

~balaustinus

I am going crazy.  There is no other way to describe my thought process right now.  

It's finals week, and I know since I've been so damn lazy, I'm going to end up getting mostly F's in my classes.  And I can't stand the fact that I've let it come to this.  I feel so disgusted with myself.

To make matters worse, my mother has been threatening to kick me out of the house because of my grades.  And if she does that, I don't know what I'll do.  I have no way to support myself.  I'm also afraid that if I decide to stop going to school and get a job, then I'll be stuck in a low-class lifestyle for the rest of my life, and I won't be able to realize any of my dreams.

I just...don't know who I'm living for anymore.  I don't know what I want out of life.  And it's really scary, being twenty years old and having to face these decisions.  I really don't know what to do.

I know this is a bit of a ramble, but I needed to get it out.  And I really don't have anyone here to talk to.  So my LJ seemed as good a bet as any.

I'm going to go fret some more.  Even though it's my fault, I still hate this.

~balaustinus